Monday, May 05, 2014

Have You Had Transient Lingual Papillitis?

Sure you have. The little inflamed, white bumps on the tongue that hurt like a sombitch?

Well, here's the treatment, as unlikely as it sounds.

Get some liquid Maalox, Mylanta, etc, and some Children's liquid Benadryl (store brands, as pictured above are just fine, and cheap -- that stuff above cost under $5, tax an' all). Mix it 50/50 in the little cup that comes with the kid's Benadryl, and swish it around in yer mouth. 60 seconds later, spit it out.

Repeat as needed. Don't swallow it unless you wanna go to sleep (Benadryl affects many people thataways).


  1. So what the hell is this cunning linguist papyrus shit anyway? Bacterial infections, something viral, alien body fluid residue reaction? I had an infection of something once that gave me cold sores all over the inside of my mouth (yes it was horrible) but never little white dots.

    1. The white dots are inflamed "taste buds," or papillae. They're only on the tongue. Docs are not ready to declare a cause, although low oral pH is thought to be correlated. So it is thought that's how the liquid antacid helps, whereas the diphenhydramine alleviates the swelling and pain.

  2. Hey, JP...

    Allergic to benadryl, any idea if this could work with another allergy product??

    - maddy.ann