Have You Had Transient Lingual Papillitis?

Sure you have. The little inflamed, white bumps on the tongue that hurt like a sombitch?

Well, here's the treatment, as unlikely as it sounds.

Get some liquid Maalox, Mylanta, etc, and some Children's liquid Benadryl (store brands, as pictured above are just fine, and cheap -- that stuff above cost under $5, tax an' all). Mix it 50/50 in the little cup that comes with the kid's Benadryl, and swish it around in yer mouth. 60 seconds later, spit it out.

Repeat as needed. Don't swallow it unless you wanna go to sleep (Benadryl affects many people thataways).
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My Dinner With Andre

This crazy fucker is Andre, my (now-naturalized U.S. citizen) buddy who grew up and lived most of his life in Durban, South Africa. You've probably seen me mention him, before, but we had a falling out a few years back over something completely stupid, and I'm in the frame of mind to stop being stupid and to begin setting things right with people I have wronged in the past. So!  We have reconnected, and it's pretty awesome.

The stories he and I could tell about one another would make an entertaining book. Really.

Good to have him back in my life. I missed Andre. Now, to work on James in Columbus.
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A Day In Steele Creek Park

Bristol, Tennessee.
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Dumpster Diving: Mini-Fridge

What red-blooded, American man hasn't at one time lusted for a beer fridge? Maybe even big enough to fit a pony keg inside?

Well, I was fortunate to have still been working at Peabody College when the students were packing it in to go home for the summer. We vultures skulk about the dumpsters, and find perfectly serviceable goodies that Mom & Pop don't wanna haul back to Indonesia Indiana, such as this very new Kenmore fridge!

It's mine, now. And it works perfectly. The freezer even works!
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For Realz, Yo

Gonna go shoot some scooty video while picking up a 4-to-4-pin Firewire cable (not included!).
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This Week's Insane Idea, #47

Can ya see JP (a/k/a, Our Hero) as street vendor, in floppy red, white and blue Uncle Sam novelty hat from Spencer Gifts, hawking this frickin' thang:

Yeah, I know... WTF izzit? Well, I'll tell ya -- simmer down, you! Cheese, Louise... y'all are so impatient!

This is a Swipes™ reusable eyewear lens cleaner, and this mutha is handier than a pocket on a shirt. Won't scratch plastic lenses, dishwasher safe (for cleaning), and the best stocking stuffer on the planet. Everone who wears external lenses of any sort needs one of these, and would love to have one. Combine it with a teensy dab of that Aldi hand sanitizer on each lens' surface, and you got a lens cleaner that not even dried gorilla snot can frustrate. Of course, if you're close enough to a gorilla as to allow its snot to land on your glasses, you might have bigger issues than dirty glasses. ;)

You can get these from me, postpaid, for $7.00 each, or 4 for $21.00 ("buy three, get one free!"). Or, you can get one at Walgreen's for $3.99. :)

Can you see me doin' this, though? Toolin' downtown around lunchtime, sellin' these until I make $30+ during lunch, and spending the rest of my time jackin' around the 'net with you yahoos? Would that fuckin' rawk, or what?!?

UPDATE: Lookee what I did -- integrated the Swipes™ with an old badge lanyard. Now, I have scooter and house keys and Swipes™ right at hand, at the ready, allatime. I can sell a metric buttload of these, I know. And think of it -- if I make $30/day, that will pay not only my rent, but food for Curly and me, and gas for the scooter, etc. All else is gravy.

I could not have arrived at this improbable place without y'all -- Thank You And You And You And You And You.

UPDATE II -- Speakin' of smudgy glasses, I almost forgot about this asshole.
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